How much do I want Jesus?

John 6: 67-68 (You should read the rest too in my opinion. The heading is called Many Disciples Desert Jesus).

       "You do not want to leave too, do you?" Jesus asked the Twelve.
       Simon Peter answered him "Lord to whom shall we go?"


I don't think this was a happy "Are you ready to go now?" type-question. I think that Jesus felt betrayed. Many of his followers left him. Many of his friends left him. They wrote him off as a nut-job and left him. So when he asked the Twelve this I imagine that either he asked it sarcastically or he point blank yelled it at them.

It was a serious question. He was really asking his disciples. "Do you believe what I'm saying? Do you believe that I am who I say I am? Are you willing to stick with me and my mission?"

I love Peter's response, "Lord to whom shall we go?" Where else could we go? The disciples knew the truth about Jesus and they were willing to stick to him. They wanted him more than they wanted to avoid trouble. They were willing to go through what Jesus was going through just then.

How much do I want to avoid trouble?
How much do I want Jesus?
Am I willing to lose what he lost? His friends deserted him; am I willing to risk that? He faced opposition everyday. Do I want Jesus enough to be willing to go through all that?

I know that I want Jesus more. I would follow Jesus to the end of the earth in exchange for merely a glance in my direction. At least I think I would. But Jesus promises so much more than that! He has promised me life to the full (John 10:10). And to me life to the full is life with him as my Saviour, as my God and as my best friend.

What I have learnt from Superhero's

In the title it says Superhero's. As in plural heros. Well I only really have one thing I've learned here but you don't really want to hear me rave about how Spiderman is too imperfect while Superman is too perfect to be believable...  :)

This is what I have learnt from the Green Lantern. I actually wrote this part last summer if you really want to know.

I got to go and see the movie the Green Lantern today. It was really good. The part of the story that griped me was the war between fear and willpower. The hero was not fearless, in fact he was the type that pretends that they aren't scared in order to hide their fear problems. He nearly gave up but then he was reminded that although he wasn't fearless he was courageous.

That got me thinking. Fearless and courageous are not synonyms. You do not have to be fearless in order to be courageous. Being courageous means facing your fears and conquering them.

"Courage is resistance to fear, mastery to fear, not absence of fear."
                                                                          Mark Twain.

Being courageous is not pretending that you are not afraid of something. It is not shown through stupid reckless feats. Courage is standing up against the things that hold you back from God and the dreams that were meant for you to fulfil.

1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Love is what drives out fear. Love is what gives us courage. Jesus loved us enough to have stakes driven into his hands and feet. Yes he was God but he was also human. Do you think that he was scared to death? You betcha. But he loved us enough to do it anyways. And even though he probably didn't know how it was going to work out he trusted God enough to do that. His love for us not only conquered his fears but our fears as well.

Scared

             not fearless

Terrified

              but courageous all the same

Going out to defeat the crowd

Challenging the said norm

Knowing that

                     you'll never come back the same

Facing the fear

             Finding the light

Gathering the bravery

To admit I'm not okay

And going to face my fears anyways

Don't be afraid to stand out, That's how the lost get found.

*Last line from Britt Nicole's "The Lost Get Found"

Me and God's blog.

I'd like to have a blog.

It would be a way to stick my journal out there. A way to put how I feel out there. I'm not really sure if I would care if anyone read it or not. I probably care, I just don't think I do... yet. Anyways there's kind of a catch; God's catch.

I can't just write the things God teaches me on the good days, I'd also have to write what he teaches me on the bad days. Allowing myself to be vulnerable to more than a piece of paper. But God is giving me a promise. If I do this and I do it faithfully he will use it. He will use it and the outcome whether I see it or not will be great.

It's gonna be great.